Echoes of Lost Generations Journal 002

Saturday, December 26, 2009

It is the weekend after Christmas
I've been fighting depression all month
Frustrated with business and the non-stop battle to stay afloat
Drowning in my own self-pity
But no idea how to stay down
All I know how to do is fight
I'm a veteran at struggling...
Sadness...
When that is one of your strong points
Mastering the art of living broke
Blockbuster nights
Playing Monopoly, Taboo, Eating Good
Sharing smiles, handshakes, hugs, and laughs
Enjoying life as it comes
Treasuring each moment as a rare jewel
And never, Never focus on the negative...
I started this entry with the intent to expose my hurt
I wanted you to see that I am but a man
wanted to show my flaws
But see now that it is not so easy
I have no true complaints
I trust God
I trust myself
I trust my wife
Took me a few years to get to this point
Able to lean on my wife
My socio-structure looked down on that
Not for even the smallest reason
Did a man depend on his wife
I see so much error in my perception now
If I dont have my wife to lean on, then I have nothing
I may as well be alone
And it sure feels good to "NOT" be alone right now
In what appears to be one of my greatest hours of need
Without the mental support of such a strong women
I would surely be out doing something negative
Or lying somewhere in a pool of self prescribed hate
There is something very alluring about 2010
Something telling me that its ok to go forward
 
Mario D'Andre Robinson
CEO / Brand Manager
8 Robinsons LLC
8 Robinsons Entertainment
Green Cre8tions